NEW YORK – I was halfway through my third chicken caviar-topped batch when two thoughts occurred to me at the same time: First, this batch is excellent, but not $100 good. Secondly, this is the type that breeds conversions… and they don’t end well, those who are eating caviar-whole mass.
This year, the US Open has achieved its true destiny, from a tennis tournament to a full-blown festival with tennis equivalents. Maybe it’s the photos or Tiktok dance routines interrupting the stories themselves, maybe it’s the long-winded speech about finding reasonably priced tickets, or maybe it’s the brisk sale of three-figure fast food, but the US Open has taken the American game to a new level. I hope you were saving up that bucket-list experience.
Advertisement
As crowds poured into the Billie Jean King Tennis Center on Saturday for some of the final matches of the 2026 US Open, some sought seats around one of the complex’s many tennis courts. Others head straight to the mall to pick up some expensive gear. And many, so many, went straight to one of the Gray Goose stands in search of the Open’s most cherished treasure: the beloved Honey Deuce.
The Honey Deuce — Gray Goose vodka, lemonade, red rum and three melon balls of honey, served over ice in a commemorative glass — is the most well-known of the many food and drink options at the US Open, but other, far more expensive gifts come for the crown.
So with that in mind, I decided to take on a spending-account-dipping challenge: the $200 US Open lunch. Let’s just see how the 1 percent fares, shall we?
Honey Deuce ($23); Journalists aren’t supposed to drink on the job, so let me tell you “my good friend” bought this one and enjoyed it very much, although a significant portion of that enjoyment came from the fact that it was served over ice on a very hot day. Cold gasoline with melon garnished with honey had tasted pretty good on Saturday. And yes, my “friend”, he immediately sent a picture of the glass to his text chain. It’s at the elite level.
Advertisement
Salt Hank’s French Dip Sandwich ($38); This is the hottest food offering this year at the Open, so much so that the salt hank has been given a pretentious slot between all the food stalls, so that it can better accommodate the lines of the dress. I’m the third person in line at 10:50, and by the time Hank Salt started lining up at 11, there were already at least 40 people behind me. The sandwich — “prime dry-aged prime rib, provolone, caramelized onions, horseradish aioli, baguette” — was a damn good sandwich. Seriously, the best I’ve ever had. And so it was also half overpriced. But I’ll be dreaming of that sandwich for years to come. Yes, I want to.
US Open Souvenir Cup ($12.50); It’s a cup. A nice cup, yes, but still – a cup. Good for backyard barbecues where you can casually mention, “Oh, I got this when I was at the US Open. Maybe one day you can go too.” (You won’t be invited to backyard barbecues after this).
Gold Set COQODAQ ($100, not misprint); The dumplings are delicious, even light and fried golden. But the selling point here isn’t crème fraîche, scallions, or grated radish. Yes, paying for 30 P. – just over an ounce – Tsar Caesarea Daurenki caviar from Petrossiano, which adds a rich and complex finish to the chicken mass. It does a whole lot more than honey mustard, anyway.
Honeycomb Fudge Slam at Van Leeuwen ($10.75 & up); Ice cream merchants are the early adopters of the mega-expensive snack treat trend, so they charge you perfectly at leisure for exorbitant cones that would be three bucks on the beach. This US Open-only flavor is indeed delicious, though on top of French Dip, caviar, chicken and (perhaps) other drinks, my stomach is served like Aryna Sabalenka. This is my fault, not the honeycomb in the quiver.
Advertisement
Total cost: $184.25. For one person. For lunch. That is important.
Open lunch at $200 US. (Yahoo Sports)
This is all part of a trend that is consuming the elite ranks in American sports: The death is a cheap seatand all that pertains to it. American sports organizations have become very adept at extracting the maximum revenue possible from each and every ticket holder. If the price of a four-legged ticket is a little richer than your blood, well, back off, my friend, there is someone who will gladly pay.
You really can’t fault Open for fishing where the whales are. The game always had a nice and white scarf, dressed in strawberries and milk. Authority comes with a cost; if everyone could afford it, what’s the point?
Advertisement
The thing is, as these prices are exorbitant, there are people – lots of people – out there willing to pay. A collector at COQODAQ estimated that he sells 250 of the $100 gold each day, and just one of the dozens of Deuce honey servers estimated that he alone pours 1,500 of the rose and melon drink per day.
Now it should be noted that no one in their right mind buys chicken nuggets with caviar at a tennis tournament because they are hungry. (Indeed, there are plenty of low-cost foods.) The whole reason is to drop Benjamin into clumps, so that you can show others, indeed, to drop Benjamin into clumps. (It’s me, hi. I’m the problem.) Everyone here who takes a selfie stretching Mel Deuce has to run around five other people who are also taking selfies with their Honey God
The whole problem here is that Aperi – like so many other high-profile concerts and sporting events – have now become a social laboratory of social media, whose value is not in experiencing, but in sharing the experience.
The same thing happened at the Masters last year, when the hype surrounding the legendary golf tournament’s merchandise, particularly the limited-edition gnomes, was overcooked. The influencers walked through the gates, waited in line to build traffic for well over an hour, bagged the average of four figures of outstanding master brands, then left the movie theater to admire the audience – with absolutely no interest in the golf that is supposed to be the center of the event.
Advertisement
Rumors persist that Augusta National will sell the gnome next year in order to bring some sanctity back into the tournament. Augusta National, the only place in America that protects a mass cell phone, can get away with it. No one else can.
Which, in fact, is the only answer to the insane inflation of sports costs – the willingness to withdraw short-term cash grabs in favor of long-term goodwill. (And this is why the people with price control want to “answer” this at all.) Just for perspective: Teachers, you can buy 66 pimento cheese sandwiches for the price of one US Open Gold Set, or nearly four beers for the cost of one Honey Deuce.
This financial burden of tolerance is the new reality of sports fandom in America. If you want to pay, elite leagues, tournaments and courses will happily take your money. And if you’re not, you can find chicken nuggets almost as good as the US Open ones at a decent drive-thru. Trust me on that.
